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Ponderisms
Can you cry under water?
How important does a person have
to be before they are considered
assassinated instead of just
murdered? Why do you have to "put your two cents in".. But it's only a "penny for your thoughts"? Where's that extra penny going to?
Once you're in heaven, do you
get stuck wearing the clothes
you were buried in for eternity?
Why does a round pizza come in a
square box?
What disease did cured ham
actually have?
How is it that we put man on the
moon before we figured out it
would be a good idea to put
wheels on luggage?
Why is it that people say they
"slept like a baby" when babies
wake up like every two hours? If a deaf person has to go to court, is it still called a hearing?
Why are you IN a movie,
but you're ON TV?
Why do people pay to go up tall
buildings and then put money in
binoculars to look at things on
the ground?
Why do doctors leave the room
while you change? They're going
to see you naked anyway.
Why is "bra" singular and
"panties" plural?
Why do toasters always have a
setting that burns the toast to
a horrible crisp, which no
decent human being would eat?
If Jimmy cracks corn and no one
cares, why is there a stupid
song about him?
Can a hearse carrying a corpse
drive in the carpool lane
?
If the professor on Gilligan's
Island can make a radio out of a
coconut, why can't he fix a hole in
a boat?
Why does Goofy stand erect while
Pluto remains on all fours? They're
both dogs!
If Wile E. Coyote had enough money
to buy all that ACME crap, why
didn't he just buy dinner?
If corn oil is made from corn, and
vegetable oil is made from
vegetables, what is baby oil made
from?
If electricity comes from electrons,
does morality come
Do the Alphabet song and Twinkle,
Twinkle Little Star have the same tune? Why
did you just try singing the two songs
above?
Did you ever notice that when you blow
in a dog's face, he gets mad at you, but
when you take him for a car ride, he
sticks his head out the window? Do you ever wonder why you gave me your e-mail address in the first place? |