Some for the
ladies:
One day my housework-challenged husband
decided to wash his Sweat-
shirt. Seconds after he stepped into the laundry room, he shouted
to me, "What setting do I use on the washing machine?"
"It depends," I replied.
"What does it say on your shirt?"
He yelled back, "
University
of
Oklahoma."
And they say blondes are
dumb...
--------------------------------------
A couple is lying in
bed. The man says, "I am going to make you the happiest woman in
the world."
The woman replies, "I'll miss you..."
--------------------------------------
"It's just too hot to wear clothes today," Jack says as he stepped
out of the shower, "honey, what do you think the neighbors would
think if I mowed the lawn like this?"
"Probably that I married you for your money," she replied.
--------------------------------------
Q: What do you call an
intelligent, good looking, sensitive man?
A: A rumor
--------------------------------------
A man and his wife, now
in their 60's, were celebrating their 40th wedding anniversary. On
their special day a good fairy came to them and said that because
they had been so good that each one of them could have one wish.
The wife wished for a trip around the world with her husband.
Whoosh! Immediately she
had airline/cruise tickets in her hands.
The man wished for a
female companion 30 years younger...
Whoosh...immediately he turned ninety!!!
Gotta love that fairy!
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Dear Lord,
I pray for Wisdom to understand my man; Love to forgive him; And
Patience for his moods. Because, Lord, if I pray for Strength,
I'll beat him to death.
AMEN
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Q: Why do little boys
whine?
A: They are practicing
to be men.
--------------------------------------
Q: What do you call a
handcuffed man?
A: Trustworthy.
--------------------------------------
Q: What does it mean
when a man is in your bed gasping for breath and calling your
name?
A: You did not hold the
pillow down long enough.
--------------------------------------
Q: Why do men whistle
when they are sitting on the toilet?
A: It helps them
remember which end they need to wipe.
--------------------------------------
Q: How do you keep your
husband from reading your e-mail?
A: Rename the mail
folder "Instruction Manuals"
--------------------------------------
Send this to five
bright, funny women you know and make their day!
And send this to five bright men who have enough sense of humour
to take it!
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